A little randomness

Dawit loves, loves, loves his bath. He soaks everything within 6 feet of his tub.

We tried in vain to get a family pic. This is as close as we could get to everyone looking at the camera.

Oh, come on:

Okay, forget it:

Sidebar: A taste of America

Soon after we set off for Awassa, a six-hour drive, Kate brought out a bag of homemade chocolate chip cookies and brownies. Throughout the day we raided the bag, and what wasn't eaten was smashed to crumbs as the bag bounced around in the back of the truck with our luggage.

So on the return trip, Spence and I pulled out our snack bag. We passed the bag up to Sisay and Asserat, who sampled -- and made judgments on -- ALL of our American treats. Beef jerky: boo! Trail mix: I don't think so. Reese's snackster 100-calorie pack: not bad. Rice Krispie treats: now that's good!

It was hilarious watching these tough Ethiopian guys digging through the treat bag, turning up their noses at this and that, and finally finding something they liked.

This is Asserat, our driver. He was an expert in dodging goats and donkeys, weaving between cows, and zipping around slow-moving cars and buses even in the face of oncoming traffic. And nope, he's never been to California.

Gotcha Day! - June 8

Today, our lives would change forever. Today we became a family of four. When we walked through the doors of Shalom Transition House we were greeted by a curious little boy in a blue striped shirt, gray shorts and little white leather sneakers. As we all trooped in the door, about 10 of us, everyone staring intently at our cutie with the famous curly mohawk, he BURST into tears! He was clearly not ready for fame and paparazzi. After a few moments of shock -- man, that kiddo can scream -- Spence took him outside for a quiet walk on the grounds. He came back as calm and laid back as you please. Not so much as another peep or sniffle. He seemed content to sit in our laps and watch everyone. But no smiles, just stoic observation.

Quick sidebar: I felt certain "stoic" was the most accurate description of Dawit's reaction to Gotcha Day after his brief meltdown, but just to be doubly sure, I looked it up. Dictionary.com describes stoic as "free from passion, unmoved by joy or grief, submit without complaint to unavoidable necessity." Now that everyone knows my brilliant talent for word choice, I'll get back to the story (just kidding!).

One of the nannies took Dawit and fed him a bottle while we visited the babies upstairs. And shortly thereafter, we loaded up in the van.

We stopped at the Jupiter Hotel for lunch. It was very nice, the food was great, and Dawit was along for the ride. Honestly, I would have been just as happy at a hole-in-the-wall Ethiopian dive, but I think the other families appreciated the low-risk, somewhat Americanized menu. And it was still cheap. I think we paid about $12 for two seriously fancy entrees. In the lobby after lunch, while waiting for our van to come back, one of the hotel employees was able to coax some smiles out of Dawit.

After lunch the Grimes family went back to the hotel to rest and we ventured up Entoto Mountain with the Mooney's and Emane and Kate from Bethany, where you can see incredible views of Addis. We stopped along the way to take pictures and marveled at the strength of the women doubled over with bundles of sticks the diameter of a 50-gallon drum strapped to their backs. They were hauling the wood down the mountain. You could take their picture if you paid them in Birr. We passed on that. There is actually an association called the Former Women Fuel Wood Carriers Association and a project that helps women who do/have done this as a profession. They range in age from 15 to 63 and make equivalent to about 50 U.S. cents a day. (I'll do a sidebar on this later.)

On the mountain we visited a palace and museum, and to be honest, I've forgotten whose it was (Selassie?) and the name of the museum. Maybe Spence can remind me. The artifacts were cool, but I was slightly distracted by the 17 pounds dangling from the Baby Bjorn on my tummy.

After Entoto, we came back to Morning Coffee and got Little D settled in. We had another wonderful dinner cooked by Birtukan, then headed to bed early. We had no idea what was in store that night. We learned pretty quick that you better have that bottle ready before D sees it, because he ain't waitin'. To keep down the commotion in the middle of the night, we had one all ready. Amazingly he slept 8 hours before waking, took a bottle and settled back down for another hour or two. The next morning we felt fairly rested.

As the first day went on, we were able to see a few smiles from D, but mostly the joy was ours as we reveled in this little curly miracle.

How we're doin'

We've been home nearly three weeks. All the adoption training says don't expect to love your baby right away. The first few months may be very trying. I fully appreciated having that information so I would go into things with low expectations. BUT! It just didn't happen that way.

Dawit has been happy, easy and shockingly easygoing. Physically, he's a hefty 18 pounds and seems to be packing on more every day. Seriously, I almost can't squish his pudgy legs into a Bumbo seat. This may be because he loves everything -- everything! I give him to eat. He makes the funniest faces sometimes, like I'm feeding him a lemon, but then he opens his mouth for the next bite. We're clearly contributing to Tennessee's impressive ranking of the 3rd fattest state in the U.S.

Developmentally, in 2.5 weeks he's gone from immediately tumping over to sitting independently. He can even reach toys without toppling. He loves tummy time, but doesn't creep yet. He loves to stand with support. And he loves to snuggle. It's so gratifying as Caroline was not a snuggler, unless there was a milk-filled nipple attached.

He doesn't love going to sleep, and we frequently struggle to get him down, but I think with a solid routine he can count on, he'll come around. He's gone from sleeping 8 hours at night to 10.5. That's heaven!

We are really, really in love. We can't wait to share him with others. We have another week or so before we do share him, but we feel confident he's bonding well.

HOWEVER! We have not been without challenges. I was prepared for an unhappy big sister, but this rolly-polly intrusion has upset her apple cart in a big way. We're trying to involve her in his care, give her lots of one-on-one time, but I fear we've got a long way to go. She just doesn't understand why I can't leave Dawit on the floor crying while we read bedtime stories.

I have to admit I have anxiety about being home with them both all day/night, which I was/am last night/today, while Spence went to Nashville for a concert then work today. So far I've been able to juggle staggered bedtimes and naps, meals, snacks, and one serious blowout followed by a bath with minimal crying...on my part.

Poor little fish

I like to call this pic insurance against some future infraction.

Awassa - June 6-7

We learned that Shalom Children's Home in Awassa, where Dawit lived for 4 months, was celebrating its one-year anniversary today, and they would wait for us to arrive so we could celebrate with them. What amazing timing! Spence and I set off with Bethany staff Sisay and Kate, and our driver Asserat.

Once outside of Addis, the scenery changed dramatically. Roads clogged with fume-laden vehicles gave way to open plains, small towns and donkey-drawn wagons. Kids herded goats alongside the road. Cows that seemed to belong to no one wandered around willy-nilly. Close-set compounds were replaced by mud huts with grass roofs. The countryside was gorgeous. In some ways we were simply leaving the city for the country, but it felt like we were entering a different country.

We were all pretty astounded by the livestock running around loose, crossing roads in front of cars, causing traffic to come to a standstill. I'm not sure how ownership works, but I felt sure that every cow, goat or donkey belonged to someone, that there was some unwritten code of that's yours, this is mine. To people who have so little, each animal must have great value.

 

About 2 hours into the drive, we stopped at a hotel in Shashemane to use the bathroom and have a macchiato in the courtyard. This was the first of several stops that made our journey to Awassa so memorable. The five of us sitting there drinking incredibly sweet, wonderfully rich, caffeine-laden coffee was just the thing I needed to relax and soak up the slow-paced culture.

 

We headed out again, then stopped for lunch at Sabana Resort/Restaurant alongside Lake Langano. As the dry landscape turned strikingly mountainous, this dramatic lake seemed like a mirage in the desert. The restaurant was perched on a cliff overlooking the lake and down below people swam and splashed. Lunch options were a mix of Ethiopian, Italian and American fare, and Johnny Cash and James Taylor rocked in the background.

 

We learned we needed to hurry as the Shalom staff was waiting for us. We dropped our bags at the Lakeside Hotel, which incidentally wasn't lakeside as far as I could see, sponged off (did I mention how hot Awassa was? I actually took a full-blown cold shower), then headed to Shalom.

 

We were greeted by the entire staff, including Israel, Abreham and one other man whose name escapes me, and a feast of cake, popcorn and other traditional snacks (I can't remember the name of the barley snack). They made a short speech about the accomplishments of the orphanage in one short year, all the staff helped cut the cake, and they served a traditional coffee ceremony. After the fanfare died down a bit, I revealed to some of the staff that we had sent our dossier to Ethiopia on June 6, the very day Shalom opened, so the day was special to me in two ways. We talked briefly with one of Dawit's nannies using a translator, who told us Dawit likes to play in the middle of the night. I asked when he usually sleeps. She said, "When he's sleepy." Spence videoed the discussion so we could show it to Dawit later.

 

They gave us a tour and I saw small pictures of Dawit posted on bulletin boards in a couple of places. The babies there are clearly loved, Dawit especially as he came to Shalom very young. The baby beds are painted bright colors, and small pictures hung on the walls, they said, for babies' enjoyment. We were blown away by the love and caring that emanates from the staff.

 

After our visit we went to a place (restaurant?) for Cokes and orange sodas. I started feeling slightly weird and decided to forego dinner. I think I was partially scared that I would get sick and not be able to make the trip back to Addis. But I went to bed early and was fine the next morning. I woke fairly early, about 5 minutes before a herd of monkeys stampeded across the roof of our room, making a serious racket. We ate breakfast and headed to the fish market on our way out of town.

Hordes of men and boys were cleaning and selling fish alongside Lake Awassa. Our light skin attracted lots of followers hoping to get a birr or treat of some sort. I make a dumb mistake and covertly gave a boy a sucker from my backpack. I was soon mobbed by young boys. You'd have thought I was giving away hundred dollar bills. We checked out some cool Marabou (birds) and Columbus monkeys.

 

On our way back to Addis we made a quick side trip to a small town called Wondgenet. There we hired a guide to take us on a walking tour of the hot springs up on the mountain. I say "we," but I mean Sisay and Asserat, who negotiated with a slew of young men to choose one lucky boy to be our guide. We paid him 50 birr for about an hour's tour. It was cool to hike up the mountain and touch water that was 130 degrees. Locals come up here and pack the hot sand around their bodies for healing. We were frequently followed by one man or another, one of which carried a large machete. (I tried not to walk at the back of the group, lest I disappear.) At another location men were huddled around a bubbling spring of steam that pooled for a minute then tumbled down the mountain. I chuckled at Sisay who, always stylish, walked in cowboy boots and a pressed button-down and never broke a sweat.

 

We stopped briefly for lunch and one more time at the same hotel in as before for macchiatos and potties, then rolled into Addis about 6 p.m. to meet Shadley, Dan and Esias for the first time. We enjoyed visiting with them over Birtukan's amazing dinner of wat, tibs, spinach, carrots and injera until we couldn't stay awake any longer.

 

Tomorrow: Dawit, ours, forever!

 

Elvis?